For some time now at every fifteenth of the month Nana shows up at the house and this irks some of the people there. They say that she should go to one of our well-off relatives but I've entertained her too well and now she keeps visiting us regularly. I don't mind, really. Nana was the woman who took care of our grandmother for so many years until Lola passed away two years ago. She wasn't a relative. Just someone who had a bigger heart than all of us plus the compassion and the patience that we didn't have for our matriarch. The people at home say I give her too much but I don't think any amount of money can really pay for her loyal services. She did more for us than she ever did for her own and she used the strength of her prime for someone else. I think there are only a few of us who really understand this. Sadly, we're from the less wealthy side of the clan. But then, like I said, money won't be able to pay for her care and sacrifice, which she did out of sincere love and devotion.

It's for this reason that I sometimes fear growing old. What if one day you wake up a different person and because you're weak no one has the time and effort anymore to attend to you. Now that Nana has grown old as well, who will take care of her? Somehow I'm glad that because I'm single again I have more money to spend and save. The date fund I set aside for a grand Valentine's date this year I gave to her instead. I know that if family finds out it will be another in a series of resentments. I took Nana out last Sunday and realized we had nothing much to talk about beyond what we usually talk about during the hour of her monthly visits. She wasn't also much for food or eating. Walking around with her in the mall made me realize how excluded people like her are in these modernized spaces. Everything's too loud and too fast and there aren't really places for us to eat and talk. She doesn't even eat much or drink coffee. We ended up watching Endo at half-price, since they have a buy one-take one Valentine's promo at Glorietta. Then I realized the more that her age group isn't represented in the movie, which isn't the movie's fault. There are no old people past their prime. The most visible oldest character is Rey (Ricky Davao), Leo's (Jason Abalos) father and he's a lot younger than Nana. We did see Jason Abalos watching the movie but Nana was too out of it to care.